


Insert Goddess: Zero

by Pastel Comma (Regina_Hark)



Category: Original Work
Genre: Alternative Universe- Modern Setting, Gender or Sex Swap, Implied Sexual Content, Other, Video Game Mechanics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:33:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21946642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Regina_Hark/pseuds/Pastel%20Comma
Summary: Roy Finch is your average gamer desperate for the only coin that matters: In-Game Currency! If it's free, who'd be dumb enough to turn it down. Signing up for a beta was a no-brainer. 250 dollars to the app of his choice? Yes please! But he didn't exactly read the fine print.Maiden Maker is a eroge.Make girls. Break girls. Orgasm. Repeat.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	Insert Goddess: Zero

**Author's Note:**

> This fic comes from a personal place. 
> 
> Personal, because I've personally written too many goddamn drafts!
> 
> For various reasons, I'm dumping this version: Too stale. Too boring. Too wordly (in all the wrong ways). But not in PastelComma Scraps because I'm going to need something to mark 2019, my worst writing year on record lol.

The things he'll do for a little extra cash.

> Greetings, Maker!  
>  Welcome to Maiden Maker, the 1st Mobile-Exclusive Full-Immersion Virtual Suite Experience  
>  *Create a Maiden  
>  *Load a Maiden  
>  *Export Character Data  
>  *Options

Jesus.

> [Beta Registration Code: Valid!]  
>  [Installing Event Data: Calamity of the Cuties]  
>  [Installing Character Data]  
>  [Installing Profile Data]  
>  [Installing User Data]  
>  [Install Successful!]

Roy levels an uneasy stare at the screen.

What's worst? Falling for a sketchy ad on the internet or falling for a sketchy ad on the internet involving his dick? You'd think it would be a no-brainer. 250 dollars to the app of his choice? VR gaming isn't cheap. Just about every popular app wants you to spend a grand and then some to unlock the 'full experience'. Physical goods to be shipped to your door. Headsets. Sensors. All and more, tax not included. Hell of a discount. The kicker's that once you fall for the snake oil, you're stuck with a expensive paperweight.

And funny enough, these bundles are the cheap option for casuals like him. The real stuff? It's in the thousands.

God, why couldn't this be easy? The hell should he expect from a game called Maiden Maker. They're a dime a dozen on the Zenith Marketplace. Tits-and-Ass shovelware. Asset-flipped chicks pleadin' and squeezin' for those three digits on the back. But shouldn't something like this be exclusive to the whales?! Think about it. Shovelware companies don't make their money wining-and-dining free-to-play nobodies. Something's off. It has to be.

Men like him? Let's be honest. Income like him? He shouldn't even be a blip on their radar.

> Greetings, Maker!  
>  Welcome to the Maiden Maker: Calamity of the Cuties (Beta).  
>  ...  
>  [Announcement]: As we are adapting our flagship games to fit under one banner, we are unveiling a spectacular crossover event ending with the reveal of our latest end-rank: GODDESS. You, our beta-testers, are to raise a maiden from first-rank to end-rank. Those end-rank maidens, should they be unique and creative, will be preserved and implemented as Goddess Trials for the event's full release.
> 
> Completed Objective:  
>  *Install Maiden Maker  
>  Reward: 250 dollars (Gifted to any app)
> 
> Your Current Objective:  
>  *Raise a maiden to first rank: Maiden.  
>  Reward: 250 dollars (Gifted to any app)

Wait? Wait?! There's more money in this? He just heard about the first 250!

> Instructions, Maker!  
>  Here is your profile, a ever-changing [Testament] of your existence. With this profile, you may interact and influence your skillset. A maker may have one [Master Testament] or six [Solo Testament] per account. [Testaments] can be created by successfully mastering a end-rank maiden or by buying a [Testament Slot] at our cash shop. All [Rookie Makers] are granted one [Testament] to honor the creation of their first maiden.

Huh. That's-?

> Maker Profile (Radiant Reload)  
>  [Skill Rank]: Rookie  
>  [Level]: 1  
>  [Active Maidens]: 1  
>  [Race]: Crystal/Alt-World Entity  
>  [Race Traits]: Deus Ex Machina. Focus Fracture. Pocket Space I.

Isn't that his Warblood: Lineage account name?! Radiant Reload, gunner extraordinaire.

He's not creative. Obviously. But that name shouldn't be on the screen! It's social data from a unrelated game and the only way to do that is if something went rooting through his phone. He didn't give Maiden Maker the right to do that! Roy swipes to his settings, looking for exactly which social cortex Maiden Maker wedged itself into.

And uh-?

Uh, his phone is named Radiant Reload.

Did he do that? Maybe. Maybe not. You'd think he'd know but honestly, he plays Warblood in spurts. Those stamina packs are fucking outrageous. Can be days before Warblood lets him back in. Jesus. He was about to delete the game outright. The money's good. The beta's simple. Just run the game and bring a maiden to end-rank.

Maiden Maker is more of a idle game than not.

He'll have to log in everyday to earn affection points. And that's going to be tedious. But all together, it shouldn't take longer than a month or two to get a girl to end-rank. But he doesn't want to do that. It's shovelware. God knows what kind of scam the publisher's pulling. Data-mining is the nicest of sketchy internet crimes. There's supposedly a way to speedrun it. Emphasis on 'supposedly'. He's gone sniffing round the gacha forums.

And just about everyone on there agrees if you want to hurry up the leveling process, you need to make a uh... cum-bucket.

> Instructions, Maker!  
>  A [Maiden] is a vessel beget from the beyond. They can be found and mastered but Maker, they also can be made! Every aspect is customizable: her backstory, her dream, her breast size. But as a new Maker, you'll find yourself in need of guidance and materials to craft a maiden from scratch. Fret not, for the beyond shall grant you a vessel. Imagine the girl of your dreams. What do you find MOST charming about her?
> 
> Please Select One Charm Factor:  
>  Cute|Sexy|Elegant|Sporty|

Roy's finger lands on [Cute].

Canned moans flood his headphones. Full-Immersion, his ass. Whoever they hired isn't getting paid enough for this. A bored-to-tears voice actress huffs and puffs into the microphone, doing her best to sound like a chipmunk in heat. Guess this is a sample of the sound effects he should expect to hear. It's almost annoying enough to make him reconsider. But the end-game guides all agree. If he wants to speedrun the beta, the best option is Cuteness or whatever.

> [Cute]  
>  [Support Unit]  
>  "I-I'm not scared!"  
>  [Info]: A [Cute Maiden] might not be the bravest girl around but she'd never turn down a fight! Well, maybe the first one. And the second one. And the third one. And really now, if we're fighting a fourth time, we might as well be friends! With her irresistible tears and can-do-spirit, cute maidens employ every trick in the 'don't hurt me' book. Weakening and de-buffing their enemies with adorable antics, foes are left wide open for an easy win.

He's done a little research.

Maiden Maker is a Girl-Raising Sim. Basically, you make a girl and do quests to level up and unlock... sex? More sex? Whatever. It's probably a bit more complicated than that but who cares. The only thing he's interested in which build will let him cheese his way to the victory. Every game has one. The [Cute Maiden] is a bait buff-bot. The way the game wants you to play it is to make her last. She starts off with shitty stats and can't attack worth a damn. Her saving grace as a solo unit is that she can recruit any high-level enemy unit relative to her starting level.

And yes, he's going to exploit that.

If the game runs on standard JRPG rules, and it probably does, then there's probably a minor boss monster at end of every level. So here's his strategy: Sprint through the dungeon. Challenge the boss monster til he can inflict [Charmed] or [Brainwashed] or whatever. Ride said monster to the next level and throw it at the next boss monster until it's [Charmed]. Rinse and repeat til he beats the beta. The end.

Doesn't that sound quick and easy?

> [Cute Maiden]  
>  Has HIGH Entice/Magic  
>  Please Choose One Starting (Passive) Trait:  
>  [Unlocks at Base Rank]  
>  Passive Traits  
>  Notice Me: Lowers the attack power of male enemy units by 20%. Raises their agility by 10%.  
>  Don't Hurt Me: 40% chance of automatically ending a encounter peacefully.  
>  You Look Friendly: 5% chance of turning a strong enemy unit into a temporary ally.

He already knows what he's picking.

> Please Choose One Starting (Active) Trait:  
>  [Unlocks at Base Rank]  
>  Active Traits  
>  You Don't Scare Me: Lowers the agility of a enemy unit by 20%. Inflicts [Berserk].  
>  You Can't Beat Me: Lowers the defense of a enemy unit by 20%. Inflicts [Defile].  
>  You Won't Win: Lower the attack of a enemy unit by 20%. Inflicts [Bloodlust].

Now here's the stuff he doesn't care about.

Once he's got a meatshield or two, his traits or skills, or whatever, won't be important. That said, the infliction these skills dish out is something he should keep in mind. Agility, eh? Low agility on the enemy side means he'll always be able to strike first and that's a good thing to have. But this isn't a turn-based JRPG. Agility in this context probably affects how quickly he can escape the battle. Combined with the [Don't Hurt Me] trait, it'd be the perfect combination. You get exp either way. Halved but still, it's a lazier way of playing and he's got better things to do. Can't forget about that infliction either. [Berserk] probably raises an enemy's attack so that's a no go.

Hmm, should he focus on lowering attack? Maybe. Maybe not. It's about in the middle when it comes to early-game usefulness.

Now if he was running with a group of weaklings, having the enemies' attack be less effective would boost the survival rate of every monster in active combat. Less monsters to recruit. But like hell if he's going invest time and effort into leveling puny generic meat-shields on top of the trash girl he's gonna be stuck with. If he wanted that, he would've went with a [Sexy Maiden]. They're a support unit too. A [Cute Maiden] de-buffs her threats, a [Sexy Maiden] buffs her allies. Her disposable allies, that is.

Looks like his choice is an easy one.

**Author's Note:**

> It's about to be a new year and I'm looking ahead.


End file.
